A Healthy Dose of Sunshine

 

Yesterday was exactly what I needed.  I've been pretty non-productive and out of it lately and I kind of want to blame at least some of it on the weather.  So, as an antidote, I had a picnic and soaked up the warmth.  I really can't remember the last time I had a real picnic with a basket and everything.  The closest thing I had to a picnic basket was this little basket in my kitchen.  Good enough for a small picnic for one, though!  I made my favorite turkey and avocado grilled cheese sandwich and sealed up some guava juice in a mason jar to come along with me.  I had frozen some berries and mint in my ice cubes last week and it makes them so much more fun!  I want to have a tray of fancy ice cubes all summer.  They look so festive and summery.

dress/courtesy of modcloth :: petticoat/vintage ::  hat/thrifted :: shoes/seychelles :: quilt/urban outfitters

I know I usually keep things positive on this here blog, not out of any desire to hide my life, but rather because I enjoy looking back and seeing all the good times, without mucking through all the depressing stuff.  But, of course, life is not all picnics and polka dot dresses (and would probably be boring, if so!).  Lately I've been feeling very much like a ship with no sails set adrift in the middle of a sea.  I want to do so much, but at the same time don't know what to do.  I have this deeply ingrained feeling that if I'm not doing something, then I'm doing nothing.  Which I don't think is completely true.  Sometimes there are just periods of life, lulls, where life is preparing to shift in a new direction, or you're just at an in-between place.  It doesn't really make me dislike it any less, but it's good to remind myself of that from time to time.

One of my favorite poems by John Milton, On His Blindness, has this closing line: "They also serve who only stand and wait."  It reminds me that waiting isn't just a passive thing, waiting is like being in a watchtower or a lighthouse, looking out and waiting for that thing which is coming to you on the horizon.  Waiting can be an active and fruitful time of life, even though it doesn't quite feel as active and fruitful as when you're getting stuff done and making forward progress.