School is back in session! Today was Jack’s first day of first grade. He asked me about 1000 times how many days till school started this summer, and the long awaited day finally arrived with all the fanfare of a crisp PNW September morning. Last year I walked him to his classroom door every morning and gave him a certain number of hugs each day, agreed upon during our walk to school (“mom, I want 5 big hugs today” — big hugs are ones where I lift him off the ground). This year he wanted to walk in the doors all by himself, but we convinced him to let us tag along to get a glimpse of his new classroom.
Last year was hard. Despite having been to three years of preschool, and being in classes that were around the same length of a full day of public school, he had a really rough transition and I may or may not have cried in the Principal’s office on multiple occasions, including before the school year even started (thanks, Kindergarten Jump Start). He’s what Dr. Becky calls a DFK— a deeply feeling kid. If you aren’t familiar with Dr. Becky her work has been super helpful for us with learning how to better support Jack as parents. Loved her book and she has a great podcast too. I digress. Jack has really strong opinions, an intense sense of justice, and a really hard time being wrong. So all those things butted up against the reality of being in a school setting with lots of new kids, lots of daily transitions, and lots of conflicts with other kids. But his school was so supportive along the way, in a way I didn’t know that was possible at public school (and probably isn’t possible in a lot of school districts in this country).
Growing up in a private school setting from 3rd grade on, I got a sense of public-school-bad, private-school-good. The messaging was sort of that public school had less academic rigor, less support because so many kids attended them, and enrolled more “troubled kids,” whatever that meant. I haven’t been tempted to send Jack to private school, mostly because I have no interest in sending him to a religious school like I was, and also because we just straight up can’t afford it. But I was nervous last year sending him to public school because I still had those outdated messages swirling around in the back of my head.
Turns out, they were all wrong. I’ve been super impressed with the Tacoma Public School system. Jack’s elementary school was so willing to work with Jack to figure out how to support him. The principal was one of the nicest people I’ve ever met, the staff all knew Jack by name and they were so nice to him all the time.
So this year, I’m still worried that he might have issues and have moments where dysregulation causes behavior that lands him in the principal’s office, but it’s also nice knowing that this school is so supportive of him and actively want to give him the resources he needs to succeed. And it goes without saying that I’m thrilled to have him in a school district that supports LGBTQ+ students, and puts a huge emphasis on social emotional learning. I know we’re in a little blue oasis up here in the NW in some ways, but this is one way that feels really important right now, especially considering what’s happening in school districts around the nation.
Anyway, cheers to the new school year. Cheers to watching your kid grow up right before your eyes, and CHEERS to having 6 whole hours of time during the day where I don’t have to be a hands-on parent and can do stuff that I like, woo!